Saturday, May 30, 2009
No More Drama...
I definitely have reached the end of my rope. I believe that not everyone are meant to be parents, and to reach further into that thought I believe that my mother is just one of those people. She is too obsessive and I spend most of my time trying to be the adult while she sits there and tries to reason with me about how keeping me hostage in the house is reasonable because I hang out with my friends too much. Unfortunately my mother wasn't the individual who made me who I am,my father was, though that man is fucked up in so many ways, he raised me, he made me be the strong individual that I am today. I feel as if my mom spends too much time on trying to be my friend and find any way possible to pry into my private life taht she neglects her motherly duties. She spends more time giving me stress and drama then she does helping me. I'm coming to the point that I can't take it anymore, but I have no idea how to handle it anymore. In my opinion I've trieds everything possible, I've sat down and explained how I felt and what I believe is wrong with the situation and it worked for like a week then she went back to her original psycho self. Then I tried just doing what she asked, hang out with her for a while and stay home, then go out with my friends and then she got greedy and started fighting with me even more. I try just ignoring her and doing what I want anyway and all she does to that is bring the people around me drama. I tried to explain to other people my side to explain to her and of course that backfired because she had already told them that I supposedly don't listen, and filled their heads with a bunch of nonsense. I just don't understand why I'm getting this nonsense from her and my family. I'm the bad child in their eyes yet my cousin did the same things I'm doing right now and do you think she got this bullshit? Of course not, she was fine doing whatever the fuck she wanted without having a public jury to sentence her for everything she does. Ugggggghhhhhh it's annoying to be the black sheep in the family because your the individual who gets judged and harrassed and pretty much at the end of it they think you worship the devil and get an exorcist to take the demon out of you. I hate the fact that I am being prevented from being the individual that I am and held back for stupidity. One thing that the whole world must know about me is that I HATE drama and I HATE conflict but if you get me to the point of no return it is something you will regret immensely. And quite frankly mother or not, family or not I will send you to hell and won't look back. My mom is lucky that I have restrictions to what I could do right now because if I had enough dinero I would have been out a long time ago, change my number and she would have never heard from me again. I'm counting down the days of freedom and NO MORE DRAMA...
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1 comment:
Do I know where you are coming from. The best advice that I can give you is to keep your goals in mind because unfortunately we are still in college trying to make that good money in the future so that we won't have to deal with these kinds of things. If you really truly want to be out of your house directly when you graduate you should put away a savings for an apartment as of now that way by the time you graduate you are out of their like swim-wear. It will be a big sacrifice on your part but it isn't impossible. Every-time you start to think about all the crap that your mother gives you just keep the bigger picture in mind. Always do good in school that way you graduate when you're supposed to & remember that you will only be home for the summer then late august you go back to school and you'll be at peace for some time again. Thats what i try to do. And no matter what KEEP YOU RHEAD UP because 99.9% of the time family doesn't understand. Family completely forgets that they were young at one point and that they wanted their own freedom same way you do. Other then that I LOVE U & i know you're a really good person at heart whether people may see it or not. Have the confidence in yourself that you want others to see in you & keep in mind that ignorance is bliss.
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