I just want...

Ok... I've been doing good with my revise mode, but in my head I can't help but to keep thinking about all the things I want. I want a nigga to care, to love, to hug, to kiss, to cuddle with, to confide in when I'm stressin', to talk to when I'm sad and even when I'm happy. I've just been alone basically my whole life and sometimes I just wish that there was someone there, someone I can lean on. I carry the whole world on my shoulders and sometimes I just want someone....

Revise mode

Ok... I know I've said this before that I'm done with Mr. Yeah and I'm not going back, and other times I have not kept to my word, but this time I'm truly done. I've hit rock bottom in my book, letting dudes run my life and control my emotions. That's just not me. Imma give you guys a little bit of an update, Mr. Yeah and me like to play these stupid power trip games to see who is willing to do what for who... it's always fun when I'm winning but sucks when I'm loosing. Mr. Yeah isn't the only dude stressin' my brain, its a lot of dudes who seem to be sweet but then turn out to be vagina hunting whores lmao. I'm tired of attracting dudes who just want to get it in and that's it. I want something more meaningful, not a relationship per say but an agreement that he wants to get to know me for me and I want to get to know him for him. Be together without the stresses of a title you know? But I'm on a revise type stage with myself. I'm not feeling like the old me and thinking that this is contributing to the slut attraction problem (lol). I need to go on Miss Solo Dolo time and focus on the people who are here for me not my punani. Stop the drugs and the alcohol and focus on my health and my attitude, be more social and more open to those who are trying to get to know me. I'm on revise mode...