Monday, March 29, 2010
Neurotic much?
Hello world, back once again from being entrapped in my thoughts. But right now at this moment I'm feeling all types of funky...I'm lost within in thoughts and feelings. I feel one way but I'm thinking another. I have noticed that men is the root of my destruction. Especially if it is one that I have feelings for, I start doubting myself and getting all types of insecure. I mean I know that I have some insecurities, but overall I am pretty confident in myself to get any type of job done. (lol dirtyness going on in my head) But when it comes to a dude that I really like and I can't tell if he's feeling me the same way I get all types of messed up, like you would think I belong in a white padded room type pschyo, I believe that the roomie called it neurotic lol. This is exactly how this boy makes me feel, neurotic, flustered, and I can never stop thinking when I'm around him. This can't be healthy, I think I'm going to drive myself insane...
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I feel that like you, he likes to play that game of pulling away from time to time. And while you find it easiest to play that part while you're at school, he does it when you're home. And if you really look at it, he pulls away when you're around, but keeps constant contact when you're gone. Showing you that he obviously cares. Is it ok to play these games? No. But you both do it.
You want him to show affection so badly, that when he does, you instantly become used to it and assume that it will always be like that, but you need to take everything he says/does with a grain of salt. Know that he might not always act the same way all of the time, for better or worse.
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